Motivation for being a mentor is a critical foundation for becoming an effective mentor. If you lack the time or energy to commit to being a mentor at a given time, it is better to step aside.
When we ask mentors why they have chosen to take on this role, we often receive the following responses:
- I want to give back.
- I want to share my experience and knowledge.
- I feel that I have something valuable to contribute.
- I wish I had a mentor at the same point in my career.
- I have had a mentor myself, and it made a significant difference to me.
These are all excellent reasons for becoming a mentor. However, experience shows that the mentor/mentee relationship develops more constructively when the mentor is also eager to learn. If a mentor's sole motivation is to affirm their own competencies and receive recognition, the most important motivation is missing i.e. genuine interest in both their own development and that of others. This lack of genuine interest can result in an unbalanced relationship, where the mentor only imparts knowledge, and the mentee merely receives.
As a mentor, ask yourself:
- What should my outcome be?
- What will I gain from spending time with a mentee?
- Do I have the time to prioritise the mentor/mentee collaboration?
- Do I have the right skills—and if not, how can I develop them?
Be prepared to share your motivation and expectations with your mentee, who will be keen to understand why you want to be a mentor.
What Does It Mean to Be a Good Mentor?
A good mentor contributes their knowledge, experience, and insights to support the learning and development of the mentee. Fundamentally, a mentor uses their knowledge and experience to encourage mentees to view themselves, their strengths, and their situation from new perspectives, to take a broader view of themselves, and to develop action plans to achieve their learning goals.
The role of a mentor is primarily about listening with empathy, asking exploratory and challenging questions, and, when appropriate, offering explanations, advice, and feedback. It is essential that the mentor understands their role and possesses the right skills to be a constructive learning partner for the mentee.
A mentor always has two fundamental responsibilities: to be a role model and to facilitate the mentee’s learning process.
Role Model – Demonstrating Personal and Professional Skills and Values
A mentor is expected to serve as a role model for the mentee. To be an effective role model, the mentor must be aware of their personal and professional skills, values, and motivations, and understand how others perceive them.
Everything a mentor says and does, whether consciously or unconsciously, will influence the mentee; hence, the mentor must be careful not to merely create a copy of themselves. With a good dose of self-awareness and emotional intelligence, the mentor can be an exemplary role model.
This means the mentor must be conscious of:
- The values they express through words and actions towards the mentee.
- How their values and behaviours influence the mentee.
- Whether the mentor's values and skills are relevant and transferable to the mentee’s situation.
Facilitator – Easing the Learning Process
As a facilitator of the mentee's learning process, the mentor must first and foremost understand what constitutes a good learning process, comprehend the mentee’s starting point and expectations of the partnership, and adapt their communication, behaviour, and use of tools and techniques accordingly.
This means the mentor must be conscious of:
- The mentee’s background, education, personality, confidence, career ambitions, etc.
- The mentee’s expressed learning needs and expectations of the mentor’s contribution.
- The mentor’s own skills and tools available for use in the mentor role.
Translated extract from the Danish book: ”Kort og godt om mentoring” by Kirsten M. Poulsen, published 2023 by Dansk Psykologisk Forlag
